sometimes I feel like I’m stuck
the things that have happened
and the things that will.
just at the edge of oblivion
reminiscing with nostalgia in my hands
but still excited for the ambivalence of tomorrow
that is peering into my room through the window.
the nostalgia is bittersweet
warm and familiar; a taste I don’t think
I’ll ever be able to willingly give up
but it saddens me.
the anticipation though is riveting
all these possibilities teasing me
by existing in their absence
but it frightens me.
here I am.
holding onto the past while
trying to grab hold of the future-
forever wondering about
what could have been
what could still be…